Mirror, Mirror On the Wall

If you’re like me and get song lyrics stuck in your head sometimes, then you know that some of those times, those lyrics really are trying to speak to you. Right now, I’m enjoying some down time from the office, doing some reflecting on this year and goal setting for a rapidly approaching new year. The lyrics of the famous Michael Jackson song, Man in the Mirror, are somehow stuck in my head today as I was reading and preparing for a new Master Mind group on John Maxwell’s 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth.

I’m starting with the man in the mirror
I’m asking him to change his ways
And no message could have been any clearer
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself, and then make a change
Siedah Garrett, Glen Ballard

With all due respect to the song writers, sometimes when we look in the mirror, we’re getting a message, but it’s not always that clear. In fact, I’ve found that with many of us, looking in the mirror can be a painful reminder of all that we are not, instead of bringing us to more clarity. We look into our own eyes and see many things. We see doubt, anxiety, despair and perhaps even resentment. Resentment that can sneak up on us at the strangest of times and hang over us like that infamous dark cloud. We sometimes feel resentment toward ourselves for not reaching this goal or that goal and frankly just being a disappointment to ourselves for ______ (here’s where you get to fill in the blank).

There are some life giving lessons from the Law of the Mirror in John’s book that can help us gain some positive perspective when we look at ourselves in the mirror, whether in reality or figuratively, and keep our personal growth from getting stuck. Zig Ziglar said, “It’s impossible to consistently behave in a manner inconsistent with how we see ourselves. We can do very few things in a positive way if we feel negative about ourselves,” That’s a thought for the day worth hanging ON the mirror!

Let me share a story…

I recently attended a Christmas Eve service at St Peter’s Anglican Church. During the sermon, the priest shared a very interesting insight about beloved American painter Norman Rockwell. We remember Rockwell as a painter who provided twentieth-century America with a defining image of itself. But behind the folksy, pipe-smoking façade lay a surprisingly complicated person. You see, Rockwell was a lonely painter who suffered from depression and was consumed by a feeling of inadequacy. In her book, American Mirror: The Life and Art of Norman Rockwell, Deborah Soloman explains, that Rockwell was in treatment with psychoanalyst Erik Erikson. In fact, he moved to Stockbridge, Massachusetts so that he and his wife could be near Austen Riggs, a leading psychiatric hospital. What’s so interesting is how Rockwell’s personal desire for inclusion and normalcy spoke to the national desire for inclusion and normalcy,” writes Solomon. “His work mirrors his own temperament—his sense of humor, his fear of depths—and struck Americans as a truer version of themselves than the sallow, solemn, hard-bitten Puritans they knew from eighteenth-century portraits.”

I guess for Norman Rockwell, his famed self-portrait may have been an attempt to once again look at himself in the mirror and paint into existence a more normal, worthy person.

When you look in your mirror, are you trying to paint a more normal you? A more likeable you? A more successful you? If the answers are “yes”, then don’t wait another moment to begin to see beyond the reflection staring back at you and look into your eyes as confident, capable and most of all accepted. Here’s lookin’ at you, kid!

 About the Author

CDR_08102013_0979-_bwLynn Wicker is an educator, speaker, author, and a featured writer for the John Maxwell Team blog.

Lynn has devoted almost 30 years to a career in education, 20 years of which were in leadership roles.

She has dedicated her life’s work to adding value to others by sharing her personal story of tragedy and triumph so that others will know that they, too, can live a joyful life.

Lynn is a member of the John Maxwell Team.

Contact Lynn at : http://www.johncmaxwellgroup.com/lynnwicker/