Always meant to be
Life has a remarkable way of working itself out.
I’m sitting in the lobby of a hotel in Guatemala, reflecting on our life-changing transformational mission there, when I received the following text from my husband, Frank: “Can we go to Las Vegas on August 27th? I responded, “Yes, we can.”
I immediately knew this date and its significance…but more about that after I back up a bit.
The night before receiving his text, I’d gone to a mall with JMT friends. While there, a gorgeous dress in a window behind me CALLED my name. I moved in for a closer look…had to try it on, and as strange as it may seem that a dress in Guatemala could have MY name on it – – it did! I was compelled to buy it even though I had absolutely no idea why!!
The thought of it all made me smile: “What’s an old lady like me doing in Guatemala, receiving text messages…with a white formal dress unexpectedly tucked away in my suitcase?”
The Laws of Pain, Sacrifice, and Trade-Offs…
WHY August 27th?
Almost half century ago, on 27 August 1966, I had complete wedding plans in place…dress, ring…but it turned out that I would NEVER wear THAT dress nor have THAT wedding.
At the time, our plans were for me to quit college and go to work to support his completing college then I would return to school. But at community college graduation (in May), an epiphany occurred the instant the Dean placed an Associate Degree in my hand – I unexpectedly had a change of heart! The realization that I really did not want to quit college swept over me and (perhaps for the first time) I understood just how important my education really was.
Therefore, I made the painful decision to delay our wedding – which was not well-received.
Over time, he challenged me with ‘all or nothing’ and sadly, I chose nothing. I was determined to complete my education.
So we went our separate ways. He graduated from A & M and soon went to Vietnam. I went off to school, earned my Bachelors & Masters Degrees and became a teacher.
He went through some extremely difficult circumstances in Vietnam. With genuine concern, I wrote him a letter of support – a letter that fortuitously re-connected us after four long years apart. We agreed to see each other again when he returned to the U.S.
Oh what a rush of memories and emotion when we met again…it was somewhat akin to magic!
Returning home from Guatemala, I reflected on his military career, four deployments, my career, two wonderful sons, and our long successful marriage (which did eventually occur on 7 November 1970.) I thought about how, through the years, Frank often gently harassed me about “throwing him under the bus” and how not far beneath the surface, he felt genuine anguish that he’d been cheated out of his “wedding that was meant to be.”
I asked myself, “Would I do it again?”
In that moment, the beautiful white dress (tucked away in the belly of the plane) once again magically called my name…and I gasped in recognition of ‘its reason for being!’ Suddenly, my consciousness awakened to new possibilities!
I was now knowingly aware of the dress’ magic!
I arrived home and offered him this once-in-a-lifetime deal: “If he would choose to let go of the pain he’d carried in his heart all these years, I would marry him on 27 August 2013 – 47 years later!!
He was ecstatic…lit up like a Christmas tree! So together with great joy, we planned a beautiful, memorable wedding. I surprised him with the beautiful white dress from Guatemala that remarkably had my name on it.
I sincerely believe the universe knew that this truly was a “wedding always meant to be.”
About the Author
Dorothy’s mission is to serve & inspire military wives – worldwide -while adding value to their lives by inspiring them to achieve their maximum potential.
She provides them practical insight drawn from personal experience having served as a military wife for 43 years.
She offers easily applicable content, such as: “Seven Steps to Becoming A Successful Military Wife.”
Contact Dorothy at: http://www.johncmaxwellgroup.com/dorothybonvillain/