The Leading Edge:
Influence is the Way to Get Better

By: Ray Popham

Quite a few years back, an unassuming young man stood next to me in the buffet line at the conference where I was the keynote speaker. I struck up a conversation, building on the fact that he had been in several different meetings where I had spoken.

Then came the tipping point that turned a casual conversation into a life-transforming moment. His words pierced every sound around me and became a life-empowering echo that still vibrates throughout my soul.

He said, “I realized today why I like hearing you speak. When I hear you speak, it makes me want to be a better man.”

Wow, I was at a loss for words. Later that evening, back in my room, I reflected on his words. As I did, my mind was flooded with the foundational, transformational definition of leadership that I had learned from John Maxwell as a young military leader and had set out to embody, “Leadership is influence, nothing more, nothing less.”

I had made it my aim as an emerging leader to let that become my definition and compass for
leadership. I had made it my aim to become a better person. And in that buffet line, life had dropped a mirror to reflect to me that very image.

The dictionary defines influence as, “The capacity to have an effect on the character development or behavior of someone or something.” Great words, but the true understanding and depth of influence came through my continued journey with John and his teaching on leadership, a teaching far removed from the traditional management training I had received.

I came to realize that leadership by influence comprehends that the core of making anything better is to first make better people. It uses character, charisma and competence, along with genuine concern and care for people, as its primary tools of leadership. It works to affect personal change, drive, interest, and motivation as foundations for affecting performance, culture, climate and results.

It doesn’t depend upon power, a positional tool of many managers, to get results, but instead understands the true art and value of persuasion. It sees the greater value being in people who “want to do” something versus “have to do” something.

And core to its mission is to make deposits into people’s lives, by adding value, long before and abundantly more than you make withdrawals from people’s lives, asking them to do something or give something. This definition of leadership means that you add value to something by adding value to someone.

We deposit into people by adding value to them. That’s where influence-based leadership begins. When we invest into people’s lives, they feel the desire, and sometimes even the drive, to reciprocate and give back. They want to do something for us, most often something of equal or greater value.

This type of leadership gets results through relationships, not rules. It doesn’t depend upon rules, demands and expectations to get results, but instead unleashes in people a desire and drive to be the best and contribute their best. It uses influence to make people want to be, do and give better. It works to create better people, and better people bring better results.

You create better teams by creating better people, not by creating better structures. You create better environments by creating better people, not better rules. You create better results by creating better people, not better goals.

While structures, environments and goals are valuable to a mission, they, in and of themselves, do not ensure anything being “better.” It is better people connecting within those structures, using those rules and pursuing those goals that make something better.

You get better results by making better people.

I have learned that to deposit into people’s lives in that way, I must have people depositing into my life in that way–the way John Maxwell and the JMT mentors have deposited into my life. The way that I deposited into the life of that young man in the buffet line. I must be intentional about finding people that can make me a better person, along with being intentional about helping to make other people better.

That always begins with valuing myself by investing in my growth, my potential and my ability to add value to others. The only way to be better, do better and have better is for me to intentionally become better. Inviting and allowing others to influence my life makes me better.

Influencing the lives of others in ways that add value makes other people better and that makes for better homes, better communities, better organizations and a better world. Influence truly is the way to get better.

Ray Popham is an international speaker, teacher and coach whose gifts are inspiration and empowerment.
He is a certified John Maxwell Team member and Executive Director and serves on the President’s Advisory Council. He serves as a teacher, mentor, shepherd, coach and confidant to leaders in a variety of nations and leadership positions. He is the creator of the PRO4 Life System, designed to help people deploy their life wiring and fulfill their life purpose.

He directs his influence through speaking and coaching, mentoring, business ventures, non-profit organizations he has founded, church ministry and writing. An Army veteran and global leader, Ray is an adventurer at heart, having traveled to 27 nations and impacted 87 nations through speaking, personal work, radio and television. He spends his days creating and communicating, along with working to complete a PHD in leadership. His greatest
accomplishment and joy in life is as a husband to Teresa, father to Nicole and Scott, father-in- law to Joel and “Pawpa” to Ella, Reagan, Kendall and Selah. His life mission is to “inspire and empower others to live better, brighter and more blessed lives” in a manner that brings glory to his Heavenly Father.